View Full Version : What theme do you see? Such as friendship. Need this by tomorrow!

11-09-2009, 03:26 PM
For English. It's too long so I'll do it in the first posts. It's a skit about books. What theme do you see?

Gene: . . . He was such a good friend. He didn’t deserve what I did to him. What I did
to him. Not some accident, or mystical force, or whatever you want to call it.
It was me! I loved him so much. He was the greatest friend ever. Ev- (crashes
into Amir)
Judge: Order! We would love to call the victim to now take the stand of the
Metaphorical Court of Afghanistan. Would you please step up?
Amir: (walks up to the “stand”)
Judge: Would you love to tell us your name please?
Amir: Amir.
Judge: Occupation?
Amir: Author.
Judge: (bored and uninterested tone) Interesting . . . (regular tone) Can you tell me
what happened on the day of November 27, 2009?
Amir: Well, I was just walking home. My loving wife needed me to pick up some
groceries from the store, so I walked over to the little mart by my house.
Not a far walk at all, just a little one. It was on the way over that this man
(points at Gene) decided to run his red light and hit me! He wasn’t paying
any attention to the road!
Gene: I would love to object!
Judge: I would love if you sat down!
Amir: I had to spend 3 weeks in the hospital! Do you know what kind of suffering I
endured in that hospital? Do you know what it was like? Do you know what my family went through, waiting anxiously for the news of whether I survived or not? Whether their loving father and husband was dead!
Gene: (standing) A loving family?
Judge: Please sit.
Gene: (sits)
Amir: Yeah, a family. A loving wife and kid. And thanks to you, they lived in anxiety
for a week while I was in the hospital!
Gene (standing Please, it was only an accident!
Judge: Sit down! You’ll get your turn! (turns to look at Amir) Continue.
Amir: Thank you. I had finally gotten my “son”, my adopted nephew, to start talking
and to start feeling loved and accepted. He almost tried to commit suicide
again after that man (points at Gene) hit me with his car. My nephew had
finally gathered trust and love towards my wife and me, and this man ruined
it. My nephew, Sohrab, went back to complete silence after the accident. Too
frightened, too scared, no matter how much we showed him we loved and cared about him.
Judge: (glaring at Gene) And this emotional stress and ruined, loving relationships
happened after this man hit you?
Amir: Yes. As soon as things finally start getting good that man has to ruin them. I
just love my family so much, want my father to be proud and love me from
beyond the grave, but I can’t if I keep getting sent to hospitals because of
insane taxi drivers!
Judge: (wipes a tear) That was beautiful. I wish I had parents that loved and cared
for me, or at least there so I can try to gain their love.
Amir: (nods)
Judge: Please, you may step down now.
Amir: (walks away)
Judge: (looking at paper on desk) It seems we have a witness here. Junior? Is there a
Junior present?
Junior: (raises hand)
Judge: Good, step on up
Junior: (reaches the “bench”) Yes? What do you need?

11-09-2009, 03:27 PM
Judge: For the record, you are a hot dog vendor, correct?
Junior: Yes, an Indian hot dog vendor. I never fell in love with alcohol like my father
did, since alcohol is widely associated with people like me, so I became the
only thing I really could- a hot dog vendor.
Judge: (chuckling a little bit) So yes, a hot dog vendor. I do love hot dogs! O.K., than,
what did you see on the day of the accident?
Junior: A loving man get hit by a car.
Judge: More thorough ,please.
Junior: A loving man get hit by a yellow taxi.
Judge: (facing audience) Let the court recognize that the plaintiff was hit by a yellow
Junior: Can I go now? I was supposed to visit my sister’s memorial today, like I do
every week since she died. Just a collection of memories I brought with me
here to remember her by. I just can’t stand to not go see her memorial I
made her. She was the best, most loving sister, and I know she knew I loved
her too.
Judge: How did she die? Maybe this man (points at Gene) is guilty of more things
then we thought!
Junior: House fire.
Gene: (snickers under his breath)
Judge: (glaring at Gene) What?
Gene: What? Oh, nothing, I didn’t set any house on fire. I love people too much to do
Judge: Than be quiet.
Junior: A curtain caught fire . . .
Gene: (muttering under his breath) So you’ve been told.
Junior: Anyways, I was supposed to visit her memorial today, instead of recounting
an obvious felony. Just, I lose so many people I love and care about. My
sister, my grandmother, Penelope left me. Have you ever lost any loved
Judge: (talking under Junior) No.
Junior: Someone you can’t live without? Who’s love towards you is so great, and
than they perish off the face of the Earth because people like him (points
at Gene) run them over, and burn their houses down. The feeling of
emptiness inside you, the feeling of someone ripping your soul out.
Judge: Calm down, sir, we get it. Everyone around you you love is dying. Just don’t
get emotionally attached to me while you’re here, and just recount the crime
scene please.
Junior: A yellow Afghan taxi ran a red light and hit this man (points at Amir). I was
the one who called an ambulance. He just looked like he was in so much
agony, and I can’t stand to see another person in that much agony. That’s why
the rez kids made fun of me a lot. That and my birth defects.
Judge: We get it, people made fun of you, instead of loving you. Now, he looked
seriously injured at the crime scene, correct?
Junior: That would be why I called an ambulance and said he looked like he was in
Judge: Just making sure. Thank you. You may step down now, and if you must, you
may go visit your sister’s memorial. She sounds like a very loving person.
Junior: She was very loving(steps down).
Judge: Will the defendant please step up?
Gene: (walks up to the “bench”)
Judge: So you’re name is Gene, correct?
Gene: Yes it is . . .
Judge: I love that name! And you are a taxi driver in Afghanistan, correct?
Gene: Yes, that is correct.
Judge: And you hit this man (points at Amir) on the day of November 27?
Gene: No.
Judge: (chuckles a bit) Well, we will see. So it says here you aren’t actually Afghan.
Where are you from?
Gene: America. I’m only here because everywhere in America reminds me of my
best friend, Finny. My best childhood friend whom I loved deeply.
Judge: Tell us about this Finny.
Gene: Well, he was my only friend . . . the best friend a guy could ask for. Always on
the lookout for me, always there for me. I loved him. I couldn’t live without
him. But I killed him. Not anyone else! It was me! I did it!
Judge: Let the court recognize that the defendant, not anyone else, committed
homicide against his best friend. Now, please, continue.
Gene: (faintly weeping) I pushed him out of the tree! It was me. I can’t live with this
guilt! I know what’s it’s like to lose someone you can’t live without, someone
you love. But I also know the feeling of when it’s your fault they died!
Judge: Remember, you are in court. You’re going to jail anyways right now for
homicide. Be careful what you say. Expressing your love towards him doesn’t
help your case, FYI.
Gene: I didn’t kill him.
Judge: No, you did. I’m pretty sure. Now, what happened on the day of November
Gene: I was having a pretty slow and depressing day. I picked up a man by the name
of Assef-
Amir: (loud gasp)
Gene: He wanted me to take him to Kabul I believe. Didn’t say why. He wasn’t talking
much. I was just reminiscing Finny . . . how I killed him, how much I loved

11-09-2009, 03:28 PM
Judge: Yes, we know you killed him.
Gene: -and how sorry I was. He was the closest thing to a family I had . . .
Judge: And you weren’t paying attention and hit this man (points at Amir), correct?
Gene: No, I did not.
Judge: Witnesses say otherwise.
Gene: They lie, sir. They weren’t in the car.
Judge: It’s not like Afghan taxis have tinted windows.
Gene: Uh . . . well . . . um . . .
Judge: Before we make our decision, I would like to call one last person to take the
bench. Assef!
(Gene, Amir, and Junior gasp)
Assef: Fine. I’ll testify. (walks up to the “bench”)
Judge: What is your occupation?
Assef: Not important.
Judge: Sounds like a very unimportant job than, but I won’t judge, even though my
job, technically, is one. O.K., tell us what happened that day of November 27.
Assef: After this wimp (points at Amir) took my Sohrab, I heard about a new
orphanage in Kabul, brand new, and I needed a new kid. I just love children.
Anyways, I had this taxi driver (points at Gene) take me there. I was anxious-
Judge: Why didn’t you drive?
Assef: After the Taliban fell, I was left without a job. Obviously, without a job, it
makes it nearly impossible to own a car. That and having all my
authority taken away. But I had no children, and had an empty feeling
inside myself, I had to go get one from an orphanage. I just love kids.
Judge: I love kids too! I have a niece and two neph-
Assef: Not like I love them. Anyways, this guy (points at Gene) was blabbering away
the whole time. I was so annoyed with him. He just couldn’t shut his mouth
for more than a few minutes! Anyways, I saw this guy (points at Amir) walk
across the street. I could have said something, but he -the taxi driver- he
deserved to be sent to prison. Lemme tell you something- (looks at
Gene) No one cares that you killed your friend, your only loving family. Ok?
You don’t need to kill me with your mindless chatter on that 3 hour taxi ride!
Judge: So you saw that he was going to hit an innocent man and didn’t say anything?
Assef: Yeah, that sounds about right. I’m sorry, but despite my happiness that day of
finally getting a new child I could love so much, I was still annoyed with this
taxi driver.
Judge: You know that makes you an accessory, right? An accessory to hit and run
and attempted homicide.
Assef: No, I am not. I didn’t hit anybody.
Judge: You saw it though. You could have prevented it. Just because you didn’t pull
the trigger doesn’t mean you didn’t hold the guy.
Assef: That is true, I didn’t pull the trigger, but I also didn’t hold anybody.
Judge: It’s a metaphor, sir. By not telling him there was a man you metaphorically
held him while he (points at Gene) metaphorically shot him, or in reality, ran
him over.
Assef: Well, think what you want, I did nothing, and I’m leaving (gets up and leaves).
Judge: So let me gather up the story facts. You (points at Amir) were on your way to
the store to pick up groceries for your loving wife-
Amir: Whom I love deeply.
Judge: I already mentioned that sir-
Amir: Than correct. Just regular ol’ shopping for her to make my nephew’s favorite
Judge: O.K., whatever. Long story short, your nephew finally started feeling accepted
and loved, so you and your honest, caring, loving wife were trying to make
that feeling of acceptance live on inside of him by making his favorite meal.
Amir: That is 100% correct.
Judge: O.K. So an innocent family man walks down the street. He doesn’t jaywalk,
and waits for his right-away. Now this man (points at Gene) takes this man . . .
(looks for Assef but he left) uh . . . the man who just was up here, he takes him
to Kabul. On the way there, he talks about his homicidal past with his best
friend whom he cared and loved deeply for.
Gene: If you put it that way . . . I guess that is correct.
Judge: Let the court recognize that he did in fact commit homicide.
Gene: Actually, it was the doctor . . .
Judge: Accessory to murder. It was your fault for his life ending injuries. Back to the
trial at hand. You were talking about your past with your best, loving
childhood friend. You failed to see this man (points at Amir) walking and hit
him, causing mental and physical stress.
Amir: Correct.
Gene: No.
Judge. I find you guilty of hit and run and accessory to homicide for your childhood
Amir: Thank you, judge. I have to let my family know I’m O.K. right now though, and
that this man has been seen guilty. I just can’t express my gratitude for you. I
love you, they love you, for bringing justice to this man (points at Gene).
Judge: As long as that Junior guy doesn’t love me, because everything he loves dies,
I’m O.K. Court dismissed!

11-09-2009, 03:28 PM
Sorry it's so long. It's due tomorrow so please help me. It's worth a lot. What main theme do you see (sorry for the layout btw)?

11-09-2009, 03:44 PM
thats absurdly long...
lol i coudlnt read through it all


11-09-2009, 03:47 PM
(if thats a word, then i just made a new word)

11-09-2009, 03:50 PM
Obviously love...


11-09-2009, 03:56 PM
I'll tell you guys once more people post (and Pyros, he said minimum of 8 pages lol. It's the final project for the semester)