MagicalTrevor
11-19-2008, 01:23 PM
This is going to be a story I'm writing!
There may be many mistakes, as I am just starting it now.
I wanted to thank Pyros for inspiring me to make this a whole story!
It started out as a short story, but now I'll be adding more to the story... So expect this thread to be edited many times by me! Okay, here are the two parts I wrote so far... Hold on, I'll go copy and paste them one by one and edit this post...
*EDIT* Here is the first part I wrote!
She felt as if she was trapped in a bubble, a bubble of isolation, separated from the rest of the world by a thin sheet of soap. One move and the bubble would pop, changing everything once again. After adjusting to changes all her life all she wanted was to have some of the same, a little normality in her ever-changing life. But as time went on, she began realizing what she had feared: She was no longer who she used to be, but had become a new person altogether.
Her eyes, usually filled with laughter, sparkling in the light, shining brightly, were now nothing but two dull circles. Her skin, usually soft and smooth yet a bit firm, was now wrinkled, as if she was an elderly woman. Though she wasn’t an elderly woman. She was only 16, so young, yet not innocent. She had gone through a lot in her life, and wanted everything to end.
Yet she didn’t control what happened; her life a rollercoaster full of twists and turns. After living for 16 agonizing years, all she wanted to do was to stop it all; to take control for once; to show how she felt, truly, to everyone she ever knew. Crying herself asleep each night didn’t help, either. She felt as if someone was in her brain, controlling her, telling her what to do. Someone who hated her and wanted all the worst to happen.
She promised herself she wouldn’t come to this, but she decided to finally do it: she would show the world how she truly felt, how terribly unbearable her life was. She began to feel lucky; she was home alone, all alone. It took her only 15 minutes to get everything in place, yet for her it was an eternity; a lifetime.
Only two minutes after she was done, the doorbell rang. It was strange to her mother that nobody answered the door, and after taking out the hidden spare key she entered the house. She called out to her daughter, yet there was no answer, not a sound. Slowly, she crept up the stairs. She didn’t know why, but she felt as though it was vital to stay quiet. Yet the sound of her footsteps on the creaky old wooden staircase was inevitable. She reached the top of the stairs and checked in every room, yet her beloved daughter wasn’t there.
Finally, she entered the bathroom. Had she forgotten, she wouldn’t have seen the blood sprayed upon the floor, the razor on the counter, her daughter’s lifeless body, dangling from a rope, knives sticking out of her in every possible place. But she hadn’t forgotten the bathroom, and as she saw this, her heart began to race faster than ever.
Screams, yells, sobbing. That’s what the neighbors heard. But by the time the police arrived, all they found was the dead daughter hanging in the bathroom, and the mother, with shards of glass all around her, blood everywhere, and a broken window behind her.
*EDIT* Okay, here is the second part I wrote. This is really the prologue, if you're confused.
She used to be the popular one, everyone’s role model. People looked up to her, followed her actions. But he had to step into her life, to ruin all she had achieved. He slowly gained popularity until they were on the same level of popularity, but no – it wasn’t enough for him. He would be the only one, and did everything he could to make her suffer. Now it was time for revenge.
She took out a few things and left her house. Only six minutes later, she arrived at her destination. Right on time, too. The bell had rung and everyone entered the school. As she walked she could hear people whispering around her; all that would be taken care of soon, though.
At class, she kept her eyes on him intently, watching, waiting. Finally, he left the room. She followed him, and entered the girl’s bathroom, as he entered the boy’s. She knew that one day the passageway between the boy’s and girl’s bathroom would help her. Of course, she was the only one who knew of it.
She got on her knees and pushed away the false tiles. She then proceeded to go through the passageway – she only hoped she wasn’t too late. Finally, she arrived at the other side; the boy’s bathroom. He was washing his hands, not knowing that she was behind him.
She took out the loaded gun she took with her to school that morning. After thinking for a second, she put it back in her pocket and took out the knife. He turned around, a look of shock and horror on his face. Before he could scream she grabbed him and covered his mouth. She stabbed him repeatedly in the heart area. After seeing he was still alive, but wanting to inflict more pain upon him, she stuck the sharp knife in his eyes, one after another. After stabbing him for a while, she discovered there were only so many places she could stab him.
He was bleeding and seemed to be dead, but as a precaution, she decided to take out the gun. She would have to be quick, or else she would get caught. She shot him in the heart once and in the head twice. Then she darted into the hole in the wall, replacing the fake tile. She arrived in the girl’s bathroom, quickly washed herself and came out.
People were rushing outside, and she wanted to seem innocent. She pretended to be scared and shocked and asked what happened. People rushing around her told her things in bits and pieces, but since she knew what had happened she simply nodded her head.
She had gotten away with it, but felt a great burden. More secrets to keep, piling up on her back more and more, day by day. One day she would explode, revealing her secrets to everyone around her. Or else… Yes, she could see it now. Slowly, she began calculating the consequences and the rewards, the pros and the cons. And she was ready…
Now here's the question: What should I add next? I can't add a prologue to a prologue... Can I?
And how would I make a sequel after she dies? Oh... nevermind, I could make what happens in between... Yep, that's what I'll do...
EXPECT THE FOLLOWING:
Something short added before the prologue.
More added in between the prologue and the actual story.
Okay bye for now!
There may be many mistakes, as I am just starting it now.
I wanted to thank Pyros for inspiring me to make this a whole story!
It started out as a short story, but now I'll be adding more to the story... So expect this thread to be edited many times by me! Okay, here are the two parts I wrote so far... Hold on, I'll go copy and paste them one by one and edit this post...
*EDIT* Here is the first part I wrote!
She felt as if she was trapped in a bubble, a bubble of isolation, separated from the rest of the world by a thin sheet of soap. One move and the bubble would pop, changing everything once again. After adjusting to changes all her life all she wanted was to have some of the same, a little normality in her ever-changing life. But as time went on, she began realizing what she had feared: She was no longer who she used to be, but had become a new person altogether.
Her eyes, usually filled with laughter, sparkling in the light, shining brightly, were now nothing but two dull circles. Her skin, usually soft and smooth yet a bit firm, was now wrinkled, as if she was an elderly woman. Though she wasn’t an elderly woman. She was only 16, so young, yet not innocent. She had gone through a lot in her life, and wanted everything to end.
Yet she didn’t control what happened; her life a rollercoaster full of twists and turns. After living for 16 agonizing years, all she wanted to do was to stop it all; to take control for once; to show how she felt, truly, to everyone she ever knew. Crying herself asleep each night didn’t help, either. She felt as if someone was in her brain, controlling her, telling her what to do. Someone who hated her and wanted all the worst to happen.
She promised herself she wouldn’t come to this, but she decided to finally do it: she would show the world how she truly felt, how terribly unbearable her life was. She began to feel lucky; she was home alone, all alone. It took her only 15 minutes to get everything in place, yet for her it was an eternity; a lifetime.
Only two minutes after she was done, the doorbell rang. It was strange to her mother that nobody answered the door, and after taking out the hidden spare key she entered the house. She called out to her daughter, yet there was no answer, not a sound. Slowly, she crept up the stairs. She didn’t know why, but she felt as though it was vital to stay quiet. Yet the sound of her footsteps on the creaky old wooden staircase was inevitable. She reached the top of the stairs and checked in every room, yet her beloved daughter wasn’t there.
Finally, she entered the bathroom. Had she forgotten, she wouldn’t have seen the blood sprayed upon the floor, the razor on the counter, her daughter’s lifeless body, dangling from a rope, knives sticking out of her in every possible place. But she hadn’t forgotten the bathroom, and as she saw this, her heart began to race faster than ever.
Screams, yells, sobbing. That’s what the neighbors heard. But by the time the police arrived, all they found was the dead daughter hanging in the bathroom, and the mother, with shards of glass all around her, blood everywhere, and a broken window behind her.
*EDIT* Okay, here is the second part I wrote. This is really the prologue, if you're confused.
She used to be the popular one, everyone’s role model. People looked up to her, followed her actions. But he had to step into her life, to ruin all she had achieved. He slowly gained popularity until they were on the same level of popularity, but no – it wasn’t enough for him. He would be the only one, and did everything he could to make her suffer. Now it was time for revenge.
She took out a few things and left her house. Only six minutes later, she arrived at her destination. Right on time, too. The bell had rung and everyone entered the school. As she walked she could hear people whispering around her; all that would be taken care of soon, though.
At class, she kept her eyes on him intently, watching, waiting. Finally, he left the room. She followed him, and entered the girl’s bathroom, as he entered the boy’s. She knew that one day the passageway between the boy’s and girl’s bathroom would help her. Of course, she was the only one who knew of it.
She got on her knees and pushed away the false tiles. She then proceeded to go through the passageway – she only hoped she wasn’t too late. Finally, she arrived at the other side; the boy’s bathroom. He was washing his hands, not knowing that she was behind him.
She took out the loaded gun she took with her to school that morning. After thinking for a second, she put it back in her pocket and took out the knife. He turned around, a look of shock and horror on his face. Before he could scream she grabbed him and covered his mouth. She stabbed him repeatedly in the heart area. After seeing he was still alive, but wanting to inflict more pain upon him, she stuck the sharp knife in his eyes, one after another. After stabbing him for a while, she discovered there were only so many places she could stab him.
He was bleeding and seemed to be dead, but as a precaution, she decided to take out the gun. She would have to be quick, or else she would get caught. She shot him in the heart once and in the head twice. Then she darted into the hole in the wall, replacing the fake tile. She arrived in the girl’s bathroom, quickly washed herself and came out.
People were rushing outside, and she wanted to seem innocent. She pretended to be scared and shocked and asked what happened. People rushing around her told her things in bits and pieces, but since she knew what had happened she simply nodded her head.
She had gotten away with it, but felt a great burden. More secrets to keep, piling up on her back more and more, day by day. One day she would explode, revealing her secrets to everyone around her. Or else… Yes, she could see it now. Slowly, she began calculating the consequences and the rewards, the pros and the cons. And she was ready…
Now here's the question: What should I add next? I can't add a prologue to a prologue... Can I?
And how would I make a sequel after she dies? Oh... nevermind, I could make what happens in between... Yep, that's what I'll do...
EXPECT THE FOLLOWING:
Something short added before the prologue.
More added in between the prologue and the actual story.
Okay bye for now!